How Love Changes You?
This!! The power of love, whew! I have experienced marriage and then, marriage. I have been with my husband for almost ten years. It’s been a dream. To be consumingly loved. To be seen. We have a beautiful daughter together and I have two, beautiful older children from my previous 13 year marriage. It is important to note, my now husband is more than a decade my junior. Hold the gasp. Age-gap relationships (AGR) will be for another day but for now let’s chat about not giving a damn what other people think. Trust me, it’s an art. I cultivated this skill over time, tears, and truth. Truth about who I was.
I was living, but I wasn’t alive. I had a house but not a home. A husband without a marriage. I compromised feeling, my version of being loved, for the stability of our children. My anxiety was at it’s worst. I couldn’t sleep. The days turned into weeks, months and then years. I was Broken Open.
Fast forward, I ran two half marathons, completed my undergrad, discovered I was pregnant, gave birth to our daughter, two months later continued on to grad school, cried alot, lost hair, some eyelashes too and weighed a ghastly 110 lbs., graduated, got married, and then became an associate in a private practice. You still with me? Okay, onward.
You see, self transformation occurs through grit and perseverance. I’m cheering for you to get behind the wheel of your life and floor it! I know you may be thinking, it’s not that easy. You’re right, it’s not. That’s where I come in. My belief is, not a single person reaches their goals alone. It isn’t a linear path either. I mean, let’s be real, most of us ladies aren’t one trick ponies. I bet most of you can relate to this. I was burnt out. Legit, in flames, yet I was putting out everyone else’s fires. Meanwhile, my life was in ashes.
I couldn’t complete a thought without a barrage of negative self talk. What if I fail? What if you don’t? What if I disappoint people? It will happen. So what? There are plenty of “what if’s,” but I caution you to ignore them. You will never regret honoring yourself. Let nothing stand in the way of achieving your goals, falling and rising into love. I was told the life I wanted was a fairy tale and didn’t exist. I am here to tell you, it does. So I ask you, Does love change you? It can. Just fall in love…with you!
X, M